Cars, Humor
Comments 2

Why Teenagers in Beater Cars Always Speed

The Spouse and I were ripping down the QEW (Queen Elizabeth Way) from Niagara On The Lake in Canada to the Peace Bridge border crossing. Our bellies were full of British style pub food from the Angel Inn and the Mini Cooper S was enjoying running at higher rpms for a little while. The speed limit on the QEW is 100kph – about 62 miles an hour. Normal highway pace. Rarely have I seen anyone moving so slowly.

Traffic was pretty light. It was midday and the Canadian rush to the U.S. for cheaper mall shopping was over. The Spouse had the Mini cruising in the right lane without obstructions. Every now and again a massive BMW or Mercedes would blow past in a blur of color and grace. We’ve seen this phenomenon in Europe too, and have long speculated that other countries must offer a Speeding Pass to the owners of luxury performance cars. I am always jealous when the tail end of a Beautiful Car disappears ahead of us.

I noticed that the Spouse was intently watching the rear and side mirrors. Usually this signals the arrival of something spectacular: A Boss 302. A Ferrari, Aston Martin, or Bugatti perhaps. I glanced behind us and saw what looked like a red brick lumbering down the QEW passing lane.

The Spouse stoically watched it pass us: an ancient, rusted, teen-filled, bald-tired, exhaust belching beater.  “Pour it on Mercury Topaz,” he said, “gotta stay ahead of the breakdown.”


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