…the Spouse and I married on a Tuesday afternoon and unbeknownst to us, the WideEyedHousehold formed. Coalesced. Here we are four apartments and four houses, five cities, and 16 cars later.
We got married at 2:30pm and I planned to stop and think about it at 2:30 today – exactly 20 years later. When I looked at the clock it was 4pm and I was folding whites in the basement laundry room. I thought back. At 2:30, the Spouse was vacuuming the downstairs while I vacuumed the upstairs. Evidently marital harmony sounds like whining Orecks.
Twenty years ago today I had on a purple dress with a little row of flowers along the back, Watteau train level. The Spouse had on a suit, the first of the three he’s owned as an adult. I remember our family sort of awkwardly assembling at the church, then there was some chanting, then we were married. No one bothered to turn on all of the lights in the church. It was after all a Tuesday afternoon, not a busy God day, and marrying folks doesn’t take all that long.
Today I’m wearing a Chewbacca for President t-shirt and shorts. The Spouse, a red polo shirt and shorts. We rode bikes to the farmer’s market, hit the bank and post office, and stopped at the Lloyd’s Taco food truck in the park on the way home. The sounds of a city Saturday stood in for ceremonial chanting and the sun gleamed through breaks in the clouds. I thought about 20 years’ of marriage the whole time.
What we have here is one of those linear moments, a point of connection with the past so clear and strong that the intervening years fold. Then and now seem the same. Overlapped. I am lucky that the connection is positive. The anchor secured in that day is tied to an ever-spindling line of love, connecting me and the Spouse through the times, the places. Connecting us so that the promises we made 20 years and two hours ago matter the same now as they did then.
Later we’ll put on the fancy: the current version of The Suit for the Spouse, a dress with a purple pattern and bright red shoes for me. We’ll have a nice dinner in a place with valet parking. And we’ll smile at each other.