Humor, Life
Comments 2

These Boomers are trouble.

These Baby Boomers with their smartphones and supercharged Buicks….I think they are breaking free after the years of paying off mortgages, refinancing for kids’ college, and paying them off again. They are rebelling against the discipline of working for The Man long enough to build a pension, grow that 401k. They watched everything fall apart and the investments disappear in the Recession. They learned their lessons and have done their time. They have Opinions and owing nothing to anyone, they are unafraid to express them.

Boomers, especially the retired Boomers, are wild and free and they live in the Now.

Boomers are Trouble.

A Boomer lady took me off the line in her shiny black Buick last week. Maybe the Mini’s turbos could have bested her, but she surprised me. I think there were empty grandkid chairs strapped into the back seat of her car – it’s hard to say because she flew by like a bat outta hell.

A minute later, at the next traffic light, I was poised for the race, clutch down, engine racing. Boomer lady’s car didn’t even twitch when the light changed. I could see her texting in my rear view mirror as I zipped away. Texting! To whom?? Another driving Boomer probably!

Now, replace “Boomer lady” with “teenager” and those sentences describe something so expected that it’s banal.

The Boomers are wearing sporty clothes and passing me on the running track at the park. The Boomer ladies are getting to all the good yoga pants sales before I do, and looking better than me in those disgusting stretchy trousers. Sometimes. Two Boomers followed the WideEyedSpouse and me on a zipline trail in the Caribbean. What were they thinking?? Don’t they know that older bones are fragile? Don’t they know that they are supposed to be tired? These two tree climbing Boomers were posing for the camera and laughing as the zipped along behind me. Gah!

Am I the only one worried that these Boomers are living like teenagers, except that they are rich enough and legally old enough to do whatever they want, whenever they want? They are building Boomer housing developments where no one BUT Boomers can move in. What’s going on in there?

These Boomers. And it’s just going to get worse as more of them smell freedom and break out of forty years of responsible habits. Don’t use up all the good times Boomers – my turn at the Fun is decades away.


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